[Mr. Right, 656 words, Genre: Experimental]
* Image courtesy of Dirk de Bruyn
Women have always been the dominant force in a relationship. That is to say, women have been the ones to define the meaning of a relationship and have defined their partners subject to their own fantasies. And men, being subject to their desire to breed have played into these fantasies in an effort to procreate. The best womanizers have always found themselves in a relationship by playing into the fantasies of women. It is a skill learnt, to learn about a woman’s ideal partner and play into the fantasy that she has, herself, constructed. Women’s desire or rather the desire of all human beings is a need to be dominated. Not because they want to be dominated in any physical sense. But because human beings are naturally lost and confused by the experience of life. They require guidance rather than a need to be dominated, guidance to assist them discover themselves. And the role portrayed as a guide is that of a strong figure who may be able to assist them in their life path. This is the same said if the man takes on the dominant role in defining a relationship. They too construct a figure of a power in an effort to assist guide them in their life path. The dominant role is that of defining the character of their partner and thus they construct a dominant figure in an effort to guide them.
Truly, the dominant figure that either the male or female has constructed does not exist. It is just a role that the partner fulfils in order to achieve their sexual needs. Human beings are neither one person or the other, but they play into different roles in their different relations with other people. Nobody is good, nobody is bad, but they are all these things at the same time. The reason for many relationships failing or coming to an end is because the role prescribed upon the male or female becomes too difficult to continue playing into. This results in the end of not only sexual relationships, but friendships as well. Fantasies constructed in the minds of others do not necessarily prescribe the actual person or how that person wishes to be seen. They are roles filled for our own personal development, but as we age, we find some of these roles hinder our development. We take what we need from the fantasy figure of our construction and continue on with our own life path until we find that we, ourselves, have the power to stand alone. And once we have developed this ability we can then go on to find a partner that compliments us. Not as a fantasy figure of our own construction, but as another person just like us.
Contrary to popular belief, women have played the dominant role in defining relationships. Where many men have been left adrift to serve the desires of women. The reverse situation can also be seen, however, traditionally men have taken the lead in a transparent dominant role. Where women have traditionally refused to engage in a relationship with a male in this way as they see it as a sign of weakness and that is not what they traditionally desire.
The humour in this. Well, when women believe they have found Mr. Right, it’s usually just some guy playing into their fantasy of who Mr. Right is. And for a time they will be happy until either she catches on that he’s just another full of shit arsehole or he becomes abusive because of the stupid fantasy she’s forced him to play. And the men, the players, well they’ve been so busy pretending to be Mr. Right that they have no understanding of who they actually are. They haven’t taken the time to develop themselves in this way. And at the end of the day, when you remove the mask all you have is a screaming void of vacuous pain.